I had a few friends over to the Bell Family Compound the other night. We were sipping a fine scotch and enjoying some pre-embargo Cuban cigars on the veranda. It was a sublime evening.
However, when the clock struck 9pm, I shooed everybody home. One of my guests, an ungrateful bastard a fine and hale fellow asked, "Why the f*** we gots to be goin' home now?! It ain't EVEN late yet and what not!" (As I said, well educated gentlemen to the core)
So I proceeded to run down exactly what goes into the production of "The Road Show" every Monday - Friday on 98.5 The Fox.
4:00am - I am awakened by my housestaff. After a quick but nutricious breakfast, I shower, dress, and meet my driver in the car park for the short drive to my heliport.
4:45am - On the way to the heliport, I review national security documents as part of my second job with the NSA. Gotta pay the bills!
5:30am - After a short helicopter flight I arrive at the iHeartRadio Studios.
6:00am - I peruse Florida newspapers for stories about Floridians doing stupid s**t. This takes up most of my morning as there are a LOT of news stories about Floridians doing stupid s**t. After correcting the spelling and syntax, I prepare the story in radio script form to be used on that day's episode of our new and soon to be award winning Road Show feature "What The EFF Is The Matter With Florida?!"
11:00am - Lunch. Massage. Cigar.
2:00pm - The Road Show is ON THE AIR!
7:00pm - Chopper to Vegas for dinner, then back to Bako for some much needed rest. And a couple of cigars. Maybe some scotch.
So, as you can see, I put in a pretty full day preparing the most entertaining Road Show possible.